Sunday, May 16, 2010

What's Waiting to be Released in YOU?

Today was an important anniversary for me.

But actually I had no idea. No memory.

However, Serendipity, the head of our healing horse herd, knew.

And she took it upon herself to remind me.


For some reason I felt compelled to go out and groom the girls at dusk, not suspecting that more was in store.

That’s often how healing opportunities present themselves- out of the blue.

Standing with the brush in hand next to Seren, she seemed to be enjoying the strokes, when she moved her head closer to mine.

In the quiet of the evening, as she turned her eyes toward me, I felt a wave of sadness.

Was it hers or mine? For a moment I could not tell.

Then she said, “Today is the anniversary.”

“Anniversary?,” I wondered back to her.

There was a moment of silence, filled with sadness, and then she continued, “The Indian massacre we were involved in happened today.”

Ah, so the sadness was neither hers nor mine, it was OURS.

I was immediately reminded of a full moon spent under the stars last summer with my herd and two shamanic friends, when we discovered that we had ALL shared an Indian life together- the 3 of us and my 3 horses. It was not a life that ended well.

The fateful end came when our tribe was ambushed by white men, who killed everyone, even the horses.

Our little group of 6 had done some healing that night last summer under the full moon, but apparently there was more to be healed.


Back in the paddock today, Seren lamented the useless, savage loss of lives that day. And reminded me that we both still carried scars of mistrust from then.

That day she lost some trust in the goodness of humanity.

And she gave me a history lesson, reminding me that I too lost trust in my fellow mankind- showing me that I had worked hard at creating peace among the peoples, but in the end I had been betrayed.

And apparently, the betrayal, mistrust, sadness, and even guilt still hung hidden in my heart.

Seren said it was time for more forgiveness and healing to take place.

In a flash, I saw in my mind’s eye a circle of light and it was clear there was a gathering of souls involved in that day- the white men come to offer apology, and the Indians and horses, there to create forgiveness.

From the Higher Self side, there was nothing left to be forgiven, all had already been absolved. And yet the human ego and physical body often retains energetic scars that still need to be released.

And so, that’s what we did, Seren and I stood and allowed all of the darkness and pain to be dissolved into light. The circle came together, and everyone stood in the Light, filled with heartful love.

It was a beautiful, deep, healing moment, filled with tears.

I thought we were done. Then Seren lowered her head, placing her nostrils into my ear for several long moments, as if she were whispering sweet nothings.

But not exactly so sweet, those breaths held the remembrance of so many lifetimes where I had been unable to save my people.

Seren showed me that the current guilt I feel in so many areas of my life, was a holdover, a habit, an energetic pattern and residue from many past lives when I was powerless to save myself, my family, or the people I felt responsible for.

“It’s time to release that burden of guilt. It was never yours to carry, you know,” wise Seren continued.

Indeed, and so I let the rush of tears cleanse and purify me of eons worth of sadness, burden, loss, and guilt- asking to be released from all agreements, vows, or even curses, left over from these lifetimes so I could move powerfully ahead in the present.

We allowed the process to unfold with grace and ease. And then, as these things go, the process was done, and Seren casually walked away as if it were any other day.

Yet we were both clearer & lighter, and thankful for the gift of deep healing and release.

What patterns are your horses ready to help you release? Are there emotions, reactions, or behaviors that keep you feeling stuck, that seem too strong to be explained by what you know about your history? They may be residues from past lives that need clearing.

The Horses stand ready to assist!

Readers: Do you have a story of horses helping you heal a past wound? Please share.

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