Friday, June 19, 2009

Finally Feeling Seen: An Appaloosa Gift

The last post took us on Alex’s healing adventure of going from feeling unseen to being filled with vibrant love.

While we’re on the topic of feeling unseen, I’d like to share my own unseen healing story.

Back before we were moved into the Happily Ever After Ranch, we boarded our horses. Two of our horses lived in a pasture with about 10 other horses.

One day, when I was carrying some sadness, but not really sure why, I decided to take the healing process out to the herd to see what could be done about it.

So, I stood at the top of the pasture hill, the horses off in the distance. I began the process of tuning into my body, seeing where this sadness lived, getting in touch with the sensations. The tears flowed steadily.

Honestly, I didn’t even know what they were about- but I know that for healing to take place, you don’t always have to understand what’s happening.

Thru my tears, I noticed a big Appaloosa gelding had caught sight of me and was making a beeline to my side.

I didn’t know him personally, but it was clear that he was the self-appointed healer for the day.

That’s what I love most about this work- the horses know and they willingly offer their healing service. They will send the horse who is best for the job at hand.

All I had to do was stand there, and the best possible help would come.

And so we did stand, me and this enormous gelding. In fact, he stood a bit oddly- with his head held high, right in front of my face. He kept it there, staring at me, for the longest time.

Ask any horseperson and they will tell you that it’s uncommon for a horse to stay in any particular position for very long, especially looking into your eyes! So, I knew he had a message, but I couldn’t figure out what it was!!

So, I allowed him to gaze right into me. And then his healing message came, “I SEE YOU.”

“Oh,” I thought with an Ah-Ha giggle, “That’s what he’s saying!”

And the tears flowed harder and faster, as I realized that was what this sadness was really about. As a child, often no one was around to see me, to be with me.

So I carried a deeply hidden sense of being invisible. A wounded inner child screaming, “Notice me! Pay attention to me!”

That day, simply standing with this big Appaloosa, he gave me what I most needed right then and what I had most needed since I was a kid: To be seen, without judgment, in all my weakness and strength.

Years of grief washed through me, as I took in his most healing gift. When there were no more tears left, I stood beside him, feeling light, free, happy and SEEN- by this stranger who was now a friend.

I let the peaceful contentment flow through me, taking some big deep breaths, relieved that the heavy weight had been lifted.

The Appaloosa, satisfied that his job was done, gave me a little nod with his huge head, and off he ambled back to his grazing friends.

If you had looked at the scene a moment later, you never would have known the momentous and genuine gift he had offered willingly, effortlessly, and with love.

It still amazes me that horses will leave food and friends to serve when their heart is being called to by another heart that needs healing. And the gifts that they bestow can melt lifetimes of hurt in minutes.

Thank you big Appaloosa friend, for coming to me in my time of need and giving me the biggest gift of all: Being Seen.

If you have access to horses, you can try this same technique that I call "Taking It to the Horses." Whenever your mood turns dark, go out to the horses, tune into your emotions, and allow what wants to unfold. Be ready for miracles to happen!

Readers: What healing message has a horse offered to you?


  1. " To trust your self" , they said, " we trust you"!
    I was shocked, I had only just met these 2 horses & was confused which one had said that.
    New to hearing horse words too!

    Turned out I think it was an elder 30 year old one who had just pasted few months before.

    I have been in touch with my fears of getting close to them, one was very head shy & had nibbled hard with his teeth leaving large grapefruit size bruises on my arm & shoulder. This was over a fence.

    I am still learning it was rude of me to try to pet his head without asking permission nor honoring his personal boundaries....They are teaching me to connect energetically in the heart, & to stop my unaware boundary violations with my wandering hands!
    They are teaching me to be still & breathe & to listen.Keep needing to re learn this.

    Reading your sincere healing & progress work has helped me tremendously. THANK YOU! :)

    Thank you,

  2. Thanks for sharing how theh orses shared messages with you- we can learn so much from them when we stop to tune in, eh?! aster teachers in horse bodies, I say!